Paying the Penalty
by takeaguess
Summary: Alternate version of simple twist of fate. Luka/Abby and some cast.
1. Default Chapter

Author's note: Okay so I have like a zillion fanfics written and have always been to cowardly to put them up, until now! This is a Luka/Abby story and I wrote it after reading spoilers for simple twist of fate and it's all in the head. And it's how I would have liked it to go. *sigh*  
  
Disclaimer: Yeah, if I owned any of these characters or ER I would have way better ways to spend my time. ;-)  
  
Please review, even if you don't like it. I'm a hard hard person, I can take it! ( Let me know if you want it continued or not. It's all written anyway (well.some of it).  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Luka we have a trauma coming in, can you take it?" Susan yelled down the corridor as he came out of an exam room.  
  
"Sure" he responded, ditching his half full coffee in the trash and running a hand through his limp hair. He was exhausted, and meant to be sleeping, but he'd had a frantic call from Dr. Lewis a few hours ago because most of the staff had gone down with food poisoning and she was the only attending, with two residents. With a yawn he went to wait in the ambulance bay, finding Haleh already out there.  
  
"How was Bosnia?" She asked, but didn't really sound that interested.  
  
"It was cold, but it was a good experience" he nodded "Could have done with some sleep though". She nodded with a small smile.  
  
"Couldn't we all". The ambulance pulled up and they went to the back doors.  
  
"What have we got?" Luka asked as the paramedic jumped out.  
  
"Female, approximately 30-35, found severely beaten and unconscious in her apartment, she began to wake on the way over" she informed him as she pulled the gurney out. Luka and Haleh both looked down simultaneously and then up at each other, both asking the same question.  
  
"Abby?"  
  
----------  
  
"Dr. Lewis I need you!" Luka yelled as they ran down a corridor with the gurney.  
  
"I'm busy Luka we can't have both of us."  
  
"NOW!" He yelled as they disappeared into a trauma room. She sighed.  
  
"I'll be right back" she told her patient, moving towards the trauma room. She entered quickly, not really looking at the table. "Luka we can't both be on the same patient, we're the only doctors around."  
  
"It's Abby" he cut her off. She looked down and her jaw dropped.  
  
"Oh god, what happened?!"  
  
"She was beaten" Luka told her, as if it were a stupid question. "Can you check her belly?" Susan obliged and began to examine her. She was only just conscious.  
  
"Abby, can you hear me?" Luka asked her, checking her pupils. She groaned slightly. "Okay, good girl, can you try and stay awake?" Her eyes fluttered slightly. "That's it" he continued to treat her as he talked, trying to keep her mind of the many instruments and needles being rammed into her. "You're going to be just fine" he assured her "Stay with me Abby".  
  
----------  
  
Some time later she was beginning to come round a bit more and Luka was casting her arm, which was broken, he noticed her eyes slowly opening.  
  
"Hi" he said softly, smiling at her. They immediately shut again.  
  
"Lu..Luka." she choked . He stopped what he was doing and took her other hand.  
  
"It's okay, don't speak" he told her, stroking her hair through the neck restraint.  
  
"It hurts" she whispered, her voice hoarse. Susan came back into the room.  
  
"Oh you're awake!" She said brightly, looking down at Abby.  
  
"Push ten of morphine Haleh" Luka called. Susan watched as Luka finished the cast and then looked down at Abby.  
  
"Let me take that restraint off" she said softly "Luka, would you mind if I just had a word with Abby for a second? It won't take long" he shot her a confused look but left the room. She removed the restraint and then sat down next to the gurney.  
  
"Abby I want to do a pelvic exam to check for any damage, is that okay?" She asked quietly. Abby swallowed hard, her eyes closed, and nodded. "And.you lost consciousness whilst your attacker was still with you?" She asked cautiously. Abby nodded again, a single tear escaping her eye as she realised where this was headed. "Then I would like to perform a rape kit, just to be sure" Susan finished, resting her hand gently over Abby's. "It's okay, it's just a precaution" she assured her.  
  
----------  
  
"Can I see her now?" Luka asked as Susan came out of the exam room. She nodded.  
  
"Sure". He went in quietly. Her back was turned to him so he moved around the other side of the bed and sat down.  
  
"Hey, how'd it go?" He asked gently. She looked up at him, her eyes glazed from the painkillers she was on.  
  
"I dunno" she mumbled, drowsy from the morphine.  
  
"Do you want more painkillers? Are you in pain?" He asked.  
  
"A bit" she sighed, her eyes closing again. "Would you do something for me?" He nodded.  
  
"Sure"  
  
"Can you go check Joyce is okay?" He frowned slightly.  
  
"Who's Joyce?"  
  
"My next door neighbour, I want to check he didn't hurt her" Luka looked slightly confused.  
  
"Why would he hurt her? It was your apartment he was in"  
  
"He's her husband" she almost whispered. Luka's face drained of colour.  
  
"You know him?" She nodded slightly.  
  
"Please Luka" she asked, her voice husky. He nodded and stood up.  
  
"Okay, I'll be back soon, I promise". 


	2. The morning after the night before

Sorry have been out of town for a few days so I couldn't update, they should be up more regularly from now on.  
  
Chapter 2  
  
"Abby? You awake?" Luka whispered into the room. There was no response so he trod softly to the bed and looked down at her, sleeping peacefully with her chest going up and down so lightly you could barely see it. He watched for a minute or two and then left, feeling a bit invasive watching her sleep.  
  
"Hey, Susan" he called, spotting her as he came out of the room. She spun around.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Did the results get back yet?" He asked.  
  
"What results?" She asked, juggling a good 6 charts in her hands. He took a few from her.  
  
"Abby's"  
  
"Oh um..i dunno, check" she told him "thanks". He carried some charts to admit with her. "Thanks" she repeated as he put them down for her.  
  
"No problem, I'm sorry I haven't been much help this shift." She waved it away.  
  
"Forget it Luka.you weren't even meant to be in"  
  
"I know but."  
  
"I said forget it" she said firmly, and then smiled "I better go see my next victim".  
  
----------  
  
He continued to treat patients as she slept, figuring he should at least help Susan while he could. Just as it was beginning to get light he peered in through the blinds of her exam room and saw she was awake. He slipped in quietly.  
  
"Hey". He came over and checked the monitors. She looked up drowsily, not focusing on him properly. She was sedated fairly heavily.  
  
"Joyce?" She asked sleepily. He nodded. " She's fine". Abby nodded, her eyes battling to stay open. "Abby the rape kit came back negative". She tried to reach to him but her arms were to heavy and so he gently took her hand.  
  
"Thankyou" she whispered, falling back to sleep "I'm glad you're here".  
  
----------  
  
"Feeling better?" Luka asked as he came into her room later that morning. She sat up, wincing.  
  
"Yeah". She paused for a second, biting her lip. "This was really some coming home present huh?" He chuckled slightly.  
  
"A card would have been fine, here I brought you these". He tipped a carrier bag out on the bed, and a couple of magazines and bags of sweets fell out. She gave a small smile.  
  
"Thanks, shouldn't you be off by now?" She asked him.  
  
"Double shift, everyone is sick" he said blandly "But it's pretty quiet". She nodded and there was an awkward silence for a couple of seconds.  
  
"How was Bosnia?" She asked, lying back again. He sat down next to the bed.  
  
"It was good, I really enjoyed myself, you know, going back to working in a place where the medicine really depends on you and not your equipment". She nodded.  
  
"Did you see your father?" Luka nodded.  
  
"For a few days, he asked after you" his eyes twinkled slightly. Abby closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them again as the pain passed.  
  
"That was nice of him" she said weakly, seemingly not quite with him.  
  
"You okay?" He asked anxiously. She nodded.  
  
"Mmm hmm, just bruised" she said softly, trying to get a comfortable position. He watched her silently.  
  
"I can get you more morphine" he offered.  
  
"No no, I'm fine" she assured him "Carry on, what else did you do?"  
  
"I saw my brother and his two children one afternoon, and the rest of the time I spent in a hospital in Bosnia, working in the emergency department". He stopped for a second. "It's good to be home though". Abby smiled weakly.  
  
"I think Kerry missed you, oh you really missed some major stuff here". His eyebrows raised.  
  
"Dr. Weaver is gay". He immediately looked down and then back up at her. Her eyes widened at his lack of surprise.  
  
"You already knew!" She accused him. "You knew and you didn't tell me?!"  
  
"Of course I didn't, she asked me not to" he said bluntly. Abby sighed exasperatedly.  
  
"Luka!"  
  
"Abby!" His eyes widened in a similar fashion as he imitated her. She closed her eyes suddenly again and swallowed hard. "Abby?" He asked.  
  
"Mmm?" She tried to sound as normal as possible, but still didn't open her eyes.  
  
"Abby open your eyes" he instructed, standing and getting his pen light out. She did so but immediately shut them again as tears threatened to overcome her. Instead she sunk back into the pillows, taking a deep calming breath to overcome the pain. "Lie back, let me check you" he instructed as her eyes fluttered open again "What kind of pain is it?" She took another deep breath.  
  
"Kind of radiating sort of pain"  
  
"From where?"  
  
"My left shoulder" she sighed. He nodded.  
  
"I'll get an X-ray done, let me check it". He leant her forwards and gently pressed around the area. She yelped. "You probably slightly dislocated it" he mused. "Stay here". She smirked at him.  
  
"Like I'm going anywhere".  
  
----------  
  
"Okay.you have to wear this sling okay?" Luka told her "all the time, except when you sleep". Abby nodded. "And I gave you ten of morphine, to ease the pain until the inflammation around the joint goes down".  
  
"Okay". He wrote something on the chart and then looked down at her again.  
  
"You know, you should have told someone if it was that painful".  
  
"I didn't think it was serious" she sighed "I hate being prodded and poked all the time". He gave a small chuckle, thinking how Abby-like that was.  
  
"Well I'll leave you alone then, no more poking, but if anything else happens you let someone know, okay?" He asked seriously. She nodded.  
  
"Yes doctor". He smiled and patted her on her good arm before leaving the room. 


	3. Everybody falls apart

Hmm this is a long chapter.maybe I should have made it 2 but hey, whatever.  
  
Chapter 3  
  
"I thought I told you to stay out of trouble?" Abby looked up at Carter standing in the door frame and smiled.  
  
"Well I never was one to take advice". He crossed the room and pulled up a stool, perching next to her.  
  
"Luka told me what happened". She sighed and lay back.  
  
"Yeah?". He nodded, his eyes worried.  
  
"Are you okay?" She nodded.  
  
"Broken arm, dislocated shoulder and bruises, I'll mend". He shook his head.  
  
"That's not what I meant". She nodded slowly.  
  
"I know". He sighed slightly, trying to get Abby to admit to being anything but fine was like trying to get blood out of a stone.  
  
"Abby I know what it's like, okay? And I know you are not fine, and I don't care if you don't want to tell me about it, I wish you would but that's okay, you know, as long as you let people help you"  
  
"John I'm fine" she insisted.  
  
"Don't make the same mistake I did" he said softly, a hint of plea in his voice.  
  
"It's different, you were stabbed, Lucy.she died John, it's not the same".  
  
"Just promise me you won't start drinking again or anything" he begged. She immediately broke eye contact, afraid her eyes would give her away. "Abby?"  
  
"I.I promise" she stammered, looking out the window towards admit. He nodded and stood up.  
  
"Okay, I'm around all day if you want me, I'll see you later". He walked out the room and stalked off in his confident stride. Abby watched him go, allowing a few tears to spill down her cheeks. She'd already let him down.  
  
----------  
  
"Hey, I'm back" Luka whispered into the dark exam room, unsure as to whether she was awake or not. It was only 6pm but after the events of last night she was probably exhausted, so he was surprised when she answered, her voice huskier than normal.  
  
"Hi, are you on already?" He couldn't see her face, because she was turned away from the door, so he went in and round to the other side of the bed. The room was dark but he could tell she was upset by her voice.  
  
"Abby, what's wrong?" He asked gently, squatting down to be level with her face. She shook her head.  
  
"Nothing, I'm fine". He looked at her worriedly.  
  
"Is it the pain?" She shook her head, her eyes closed once more.  
  
"I'm just tired". He frowned at that explanation, if she was that tired she'd be asleep.  
  
"Abby you can talk to me you know, about anything". She nodded, afraid to open her eyes and look at him. "Then talk" he said softly, taking her hand.  
  
"I just want to sleep" she whispered, her voice breaking slightly. "That's all". He nodded, almost feeling her exhaustion radiating from her.  
  
"Okay, go to sleep". She opened her eyes, and he could see how much effort it took.  
  
"I can't". He stroked her palm gently.  
  
"Why not?" She looked away from him.  
  
"I keep...every time I go to sleep I see him" she whispered, almost ashamed by this confession. "I just want to sleep" she repeated. He watched her desperately trying to stay awake, too frightened of her dreams to allow herself to sleep.  
  
"It's okay" he said softly "They're just dreams, he can't hurt you, not anymore". She nodded, her face relaxing slightly as her eyes closed again. He thought that maybe she'd fallen asleep before her eyes snapped open again.  
  
"You should go and work" she mumbled, looking down at her lap.  
  
"They'll manage" he shrugged. She shook her head.  
  
"Go.they need you". He knew she was trying to tell him to go away, so he stood up slowly. "Get some sleep Abby, I'll be back later".  
  
----------  
  
"Dr. Weaver, could I have a word?" She gave a brief nod.  
  
"Sure, welcome back by the way". He nodded.  
  
"Thanks, it's about Abby, can I give her some kind of sleeping tablet?"  
  
"Is she having trouble sleeping?" Kerry asked, sorting through the charts.  
  
"She won't sleep, because she's having dreams, and she's exhausted"  
  
"Well she won't want sleeping pills if she doesn't want to sleep" she pointed out "Have you asked her?" He shook his head. "Well if she says yes then you can give her some, but you have to have her consent". He sighed, knowing she'd never give it.  
  
"Can't I just give her some with her painkillers?" Kerry looked up sharply.  
  
"No! You may not, we don't need any more rule breaking in this ER, you will get her consent or no drugs. Am I clear?" He nodded and walked off.  
  
----------  
  
Deciding she needed to get up before she fell asleep again, Abby climbed painfully out of bed and walked tentatively to the doorway. She stood there for a few seconds, watching everyone rush by. It was so crazy, how could she ever work there? She understood now why patients seemed so overwhelmed. It was a different place from the eyes of a patient. She began the long trip down to the staff lounge, deciding a coffee was just what she needed to stay awake. She'd only got about ten metres before Luka came out of an exam room ahead of her and spotted her. She sighed. Busted.  
  
"What are you doing out of bed? You should be sleeping". She was barely holding herself up she was so tired. She'd refused the sleeping tablets hours earlier, and Luka's half shift was almost over. "Abby you've only slept 4 hours in 3 days now, you need to rest". She was visibly wilting in front of him, having not planned on being stopped.  
  
"I'm fine". The never ending answer. That was all she ever said. I'm fine. She was clearly anything but fine, she could barely even stand, was fighting to keep her eyes open even whilst she was on her feet. "I need a coffee". He shook his head.  
  
"You need to sleep". She tried to walk past him but he barred her way.  
  
"Luka move" she said tiredly "Please".  
  
"Abby, look at yourself, you're exhausted, you do not need coffee"  
  
"Move out of my way!" She cried, pushing him with all her might. He didn't even sway. She burst into frustrated tears. Luka sighed and allowed her to fall against him, knowing she needed his support.  
  
"Shh, don't cry, come on, I'm sorry". He was practically holding her up. Slowly he began to walk, his hands under her arms, holding her firmly. They went into the lounge and Luka was glad to find it empty. He eased her down onto the couch, tears still running down her cheeks. "Shhh, it's okay Abs, you're just tired, just go to sleep" he said softly, his voice warm and reassuring. She continued to cry into his shirt as he lay her out across the sofa, almost cradling her like a child against his chest. Eventually she began to quieten down and he looked down, knowing she was half asleep already. He was afraid to move, in case she woke again, so he just remained rigid until she was quiet, her breathing slow and calm as she slept. He sat there for almost ten minutes, just to check she was properly out, and then eased her up as he stood up before laying her back down on the couch. 


	4. Tired of wearing black and blue

Okay this is kind of a bridging boring chapter, the next one is much better (I hope) and it's where the lubiness really kicks in. Woot!  
  
Chapter 4  
  
"Luka, finger lac, exam two" Kerry threw a chart at him as he approached admit. He sighed, running a hand through his hair. He was absolutely shattered. He'd worked solidly for the last 36 hours with only 6 hours break, and had jetlag on top of that. Kerry looked at him, and thought for a moment. The ER really wasn't that busy, the patient could wait another ten minutes. Just as he turned to walk away she took the chart out of his hands again.  
  
"What?" He asked, his voice monotonous.  
  
"Go and sleep, exam three is empty". He sighed with relief.  
  
"Thanks Kerry". She smiled and hobbled off.  
  
----------  
  
"Dr. Kovac we need you, it's building up out there" Connie told him, disturbing his slumber. He forced his eyes open and stepped out into the chaos, having become accustomed to rude awakenings. He glanced at his watch, 3am. His shift was supposed to end at midnight. Saying that he'd been asleep since 11, so he should really help out. He grabbed a chart and went to examine the patient. As he peeled his gloves off sometime later Dr. Weaver looked up at him and then beckoned him over.  
  
"I thought you were off at midnight?" She asked.  
  
"Yeah I thought I'd make up the time I slept for" he shrugged. She shook her head.  
  
"Don't worry about it, you weren't even supposed to be in until Friday, I appreciate your help but you need to go get some rest, you look like hell, and I think you're scaring the patients". He smiled tiredly. "And you can do one last thing before you go, Abby can be discharged". He sighed with relief.  
  
"Thankyou Kerry, I'll be back tomorrow morning". She smiled slightly.  
  
"See you Luka". He crossed into the lounge hurriedly before anyone could grab him and gently bent down to Abby, who was still out on the couch. As he touched her shoulder she gently stirred.  
  
"Hey, sleeping beauty, wake up" he said softly. She rubbed her eyes and opened them, jumping as she saw how close he was. "You can go home, you're discharged" he told her, a smile on his face. That seemed to rouse her.  
  
"Really? Oh great, thanks" she smiled tiredly. He nodded and went to his locker to get his stuff out. "Luka?" She asked tentatively.  
  
"Mmm?" He asked without turning around.  
  
"Thankyou, for everything". He turned and gave her a quick grin.  
  
"You're welcome, now go and get your stuff and change and I'll give you a ride". She shook her head.  
  
"No, you don't have to, I'll be fine". He didn't turn around.  
  
"I wouldn't like you walking through Chicago any day at 3am, least of all today".  
  
"Luka I'm not going to break, I'm fine" she insisted. He turned round exasperatedly.  
  
"Abby! For once in your life just accept my help, would you?" He asked tiredly. She pressed her lips together and glanced away, breaking eye contact. "I'll meet you in here in ten minutes" he said firmly, too tired to be dealing with her independent streak.  
  
----------  
  
Ten minutes later he smiled as he came into the lounge to find her in her grey scrubs.  
  
"Going back to work so soon?" He grinned. She gave him a withering look and stood up, swinging her satchel over her shoulder and wincing at the pain the action caused. "Careful!" He warned her "You don't want to dislocate it again". She gave a small smile at his concern.  
  
"Stop fussing Luka, can we go now, I want to put some normal clothes on". He chuckled slightly and led her out of the room. His hand on the small of her back was slightly unnerving, but somehow reassuring. "you know." she started as they left the ER "You ruined a very expensive shirt when you cut it off me". He smiled slightly.  
  
"Oh really?"  
  
"Yep, $300, designer it was" she told him seriously. He laughed.  
  
"Yeah, Abby, if you say so".  
  
----------  
  
"Thanks" Abby said quietly as they pulled up to the curb. She'd grown more and more quiet as the journey had progressed, and now she glanced nervously up at the apartment building.  
  
"Want me to come in?" He asked quietly. She shook her head, not taking her eyes off the building as she opened the door.  
  
"I'll be fine". She finally turned to him. "Besides, you look like hell, you should go home and sleep".  
  
"Thanks" he said sarcastically "You look lovely too". She grinned half- heartedly and pulled her bag out after her.  
  
"Thanks for the ride". He gave her a quick nod and she slammed the door and walked away. He sat at the curb and watched as she hesitated slightly at the door. Then she turned and saw him watching her, and quickly unlocked it before disappearing inside. 


	5. Trying your luck

Ooh this is a long LONG chapter. And decidedly luby. Fasten your seatbelts!  
  
Chapter 5  
  
By the time he got home it was 4am. He was exhausted. What with all the work, and the jetlag, and having to deal with Abby, he'd had a rough couple of days. With a sigh her threw his stuff down on the hallway floor and walked into the apartment. A tired face poked its head out of the spare room.  
  
"You're home". He nodded glumly and sat down, the events of the last 48 hours finally catching up with him. "Is she okay?" his sister-in-law asked. He gave another nod.  
  
"Yeah, she um, she was discharged this morning"  
  
"That's good". Luka nodded, his eyes distant, as if he were somewhere else.  
  
"Luka? That's good isn't it?" She asked. He snapped back to reality.  
  
"Yeah, of course, it's just, you don't know Abby Maria, she'll just keep on saying she's fine until she collapses".  
  
"You think she's not fine?" She asked, sitting opposite him. He shrugged.  
  
"I don't know, I never know whats going on in her head, she's a mystery to me". He rubbed his face tiredly. "I'm going to bed, before I fall asleep right here". Maria nodded.  
  
"Sleep well, when are you next working?"  
  
"Friday morning" he told her as he disappeared into the bedroom. He didn't even have the energy to change, so he just flopped onto the bed and fell asleep.  
  
----------  
  
Abby reached the apartment door and glanced up at the number, debating whether to turn back. This was a stupid idea, why would Luka want her there? She took a deep breath and knocked lightly, hoping he wouldn't hear it. Just as she was about to give up and go home the door swung open. Abby's jaw dropped slightly, before she managed to regain her composure.  
  
"Um.sorry." she began, flushing. She immediately cursed herself. This eventuality hadn't even occurred to her. She didn't have a clue what to say, how to explain who she was or what she was doing here.  
  
"Are you looking for Luka?" Maria asked her, her accent clear. Abby took a step back from the doorway.  
  
"No um.wrong apartment, sorry". The woman frowned slightly as Abby took off down the corridor. She could have sworn she recognised her from somewhere.  
  
----------  
  
"Good morning" Maria said brightly as Luka stumbled into the kitchen, his hair all over the place. He looked at her, bleary-eyed.  
  
"What time is it?"  
  
"Almost 6" she told him "You slept for ages". He rubbed his eyes tiredly.  
  
"Mmm, where's Dmitri?"  
  
"Gone to get Chinese" she told him "We ordered you some too". He smiled at that.  
  
"Great"  
  
"Oh.someone came to the apartment today, said she had the wrong apartment, but I swear I had seen her face before". Luka looked up.  
  
"What?"  
  
"It was about four, I opened the door and asked if she was looking for you, and she took off"  
  
"What did she look like?" Luka demanded.  
  
"Dark, she had a sling on her arm". Luka groaned and stood up immediately  
  
"Did you tell her who you were?"  
  
"She didn't give me the chance, she just ran off" Maria shrugged "do you know her?"  
  
"That was Abby" Luka told her, disappearing into his room. "I'll go see her, something must be wrong".  
  
----------  
  
"Abby?! Abby open up, it's me" he yelled for about the fifth time. There was no noise in the apartment. He looked at the door worriedly, wondering whether she was ignoring him, or whether something was wrong and she couldn't get to the door, or maybe she was just out. He pulled out his cellphone and dialled her apartment. No answer, and the answer machine picked it up.  
  
"You've reached Abby, but I can't take your call right now, leave a message and I'll get back to you". The familiar message made him smile.  
  
"Abby, it's me, Luka, if you're in pick up, I'm worried, I just want to know you're safe". He hung on for a few more seconds and then gave up. He dialled another number. And got another recorded Abby. "Damn it!" He shouted "Turn your damn phone on!" Then with a long stride he leapt back down the stairs and into the night.  
  
----------  
  
It was hours later and Luka was about to give up when he hit on an idea. He drove in silence, praying she'd be there, because it was the last place he could think of. As he pulled the jeep up he walked cautiously and slowly down the stone steps and onto the waterfront. He breathed a sigh of relief as he spotted her, sitting on a bench with her knees drawn up in front of her. He approached her silently and sat down next to her. She didn't even turn to look at him.  
  
"Your phone's not turned on" he told her. She nodded slightly.  
  
"I know" she said simply. He nodded.  
  
"I've been calling all night". She nodded again.  
  
"I know. Turn your phone on. Abby where are you? Phone me Abby" she recited.  
  
"Why didn't you phone me?!" He cried exasperatedly. "I've been looking for you ALL night, I was worried sick!"  
  
"Why? Did you think I was going to go and top myself or something just because you have another girlfriend?" She asked bitterly. "Get over yourself Luka". He shook his head in disbelief.  
  
"You are unbelievable, you know that?!" He said angrily. "You let me search for you all night as punishment for something that isn't even any of your business, and I didn't even do anyway!" She ignored him. "What? Was it like some kind of ego boost for you? Knowing I was out freezing my ass off and driving myself crazy looking for you? Do you like that feeling Abby? Does it make you feel special?" She snapped her head round to look at him, and the pain in her eyes was immense.  
  
"No, we all know I'm not that, you told me that already remember? Well thanks for the information Luka, but it's something I could have done without". He dropped his head in shame.  
  
"Abby."  
  
"Save it Luka" she told him, standing up. "I don't wanna stand here and listen to you apologize and say how you didn't mean it, that you were angry, that you never meant to hurt me."  
  
"Abby I didn't!" He said earnestly, standing up and facing her. She looked up at him, her face blazing with anger and hurt.  
  
"Well you did okay?! Is that what you want to hear?! You hurt me, Abby Lockhart, the person that can get through anything and still come out fighting, you hurt me more than anyone else, more than my mum, more than Richard, you topped them all, congratulations!" she was screaming into the wind now. Luka reached out and tried to take her shoulder but she pulled away from him.  
  
"Abby please, just listen to me".  
  
"I don't want to hear your sorry excuses!" She cried, trying hard to keep her composure. "You wanna know why what you said hurt so much Luka, do you?"  
  
"Yes"  
  
"Because I thought that despite what everyone else thought, what even I thought, I always felt pretty when I was with you, you were the first person that made me feel special, and then you told me it was all an act, and I realised that no matter how hard I try, nobody will ever love me that much, as much as I loved you". His eyes widened in surprise, and by now she was crying.  
  
"Abby, I'm sorry, it wasn't an act, you were pretty, you were beautiful to me, and you should be to yourself, and you were the most special person in my life".  
  
"You know what?" She asked him, her face defiant despite tears rolling down her cheeks. He shook his head. "This is too little, too late". She turned around and walked off. He stood watching her for a few minutes and then ran after her. As he reached her she whirled around.  
  
"Abby, she's not my girlfriend, she's my sister in law" he said desperately.  
  
"Leave me alone!" she yelled "You don't get it do you? It's not even about that!"  
  
"Then what is it about? A few angry lines I yelled at you 6 months ago? You said some pretty mean things yourself Abby!"  
  
"But you didn't love me!" She cried, her anger disintegrating as tears overcame her and made her blind. "You didn't even particularly like me, I loved you Luka, you won't ever realise what you did to me that night". He gently took her shoulder.  
  
"I did Abby, I did love you, I still do". She shook her head, refusing to believe it.  
  
"No you don't" she sobbed, the wind buffeting her.  
  
"Why else would I spend all night out here looking for you?" He said softly. She shrugged.  
  
"Maybe you just need to help people". He shook his head.  
  
"It's not that Abby, you're right, I like helping people, maybe it's even become a way of life for me, but that's why I know I love you, and not all those other people, because you won't LET me help you, and I still want to be with you, every second we're not together I wish we were, it's like being half a person when I'm not with you". His own voice failed him and he just looked down at his hands. Abby bit her lip for a second, chewing on his words, and then slowly stepped closer, tipping her head up towards his face. He looked at her, and knew exactly what she saying, what she wanted, so he leaned in and kissed her with every feeling in him. 


End file.
